Since first believing in Jesus in 2005, I've heard several clichéd terms, phrases and practices over and over, until they've started to set my teeth on edge whenever I hear them. These "church-isms," as I call them, aren't really harmful, per se. I've just gotten tired of hearing them, when there are something like a million (official) word choices in the English language. List after the break.
- "Begin to" or "Just begin to": This is number one to me because I've heard it since day one as a believer. Example: "Father, begin to reveal Yourself to so and so," or "You have no idea the power given to you if you would just begin to..." I think I understand the origination of it, that you'll never be "finished" with any aspect of life in God. So they don't want to say something like, "Understand that God is not limited by what we see..." because we'll never fully understand it. I, however, think that it's implied and doesn't need to be in every other sentence
- "Bless your/their heart": This one is mostly in the south, as far as I can tell, and I see it used as both a justification for saying something that was a little meaner about someone than they should have, and as a replacement for something like "Oh, that's so terrible!" when someone has gotten sick or hurt, etc. The second usage doesn't really bother me, because no one likes to be reminded that their situation isn't so great. I do think that instead of just saying "bless your heart", you should actually pray for them and so bless them. As for the first, I'm going to go ahead and call it a sin. "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." Ephesians 4:29 (Underline is mine). So the simple solution here is to do like Jesus said, and only do what you would want others to do to you, including what you say about them.
Can't you just hear it coming out of her mouth? - Using a title of God every third word: The most prominent place I've seen this is in certain family members of mine, but I've heard it out of pastors, too. If you were having a conversation with nearly anyone (unless you were brown-nosing a higher-up, which isn't so great anyway), would you say their name at the beginning, middle, and end of each sentence? For example: "Friend Robert, I would like to thank you, Friend Robert, for inviting me to your party, Friend Robert, since it's such an honor, Friend Robert." Ridiculous, no? I understand that God is God, and He deserves all honor, but He's also your best friend, who decided to come down here to get you and lives in your physical body. Look at a prayer from a man after God's own heart in Psalm 8:
1 LORD, our Lord,
He only used the title of the Lord twice in the entire thing! My point is, you wouldn't address any other person in this way, so why address the person of God like this?
how majestic is your name in all the earth!
You have set your glory
in the heavens.
2 Through the praise of children and infants
you have established a stronghold against your enemies,
to silence the foe and the avenger.
3 When I consider your heavens,
the work of your fingers,
the moon and the stars,
which you have set in place,
4 what is mankind that you are mindful of them,
human beings that you care for them?
5 You have made them a little lower than the angels
and crowned them with glory and honor.
6 You made them rulers over the works of your hands;
you put everything under their feet:
7 all flocks and herds,
and the animals of the wild,
8 the birds in the sky,
and the fish in the sea,
all that swim the paths of the seas.
9 LORD, our Lord,
how majestic is your name in all the earth! - Pastors soliciting praise from the congregation: This is one of the few things my pastor does that makes him imperfect. One of his favorite lines is "I know I'm preaching better than you're Amen-ing!" This bugs me for two reasons. First, it's not about the pastor, but about God and the word, so he shouldn't be worried about receiving positive reinforcement from his audience. Second, the audience should know that the pastor is still a man, and men need affirmation. Let him know that you're listening and that you agree with the word being preached, and he won't have to incite you to respond. You don't have to shout "Amen! Preach it!" every time he pounds his fist on the pulpit (I thank Jesus that we don't actually have one), but give him a nod, take notes, lean in when he starts getting intense, and when he flourishes a big truth, applaud. Easy peasy lemon squeezy. Some of these may even build up your own faith.
Aren't you glad we're not European?
Image credit: Geograph.org.uk
- Calling church leaders (especially males) "Brother/sister so and so": This bothers me for a similar reason as using God's title all the time. If we're all really brothers and sisters, why use the title? Just like not addressing my friends by their title, I've never addressed my siblings as Brother Brandon or Sister Shelby, have you?
Did I leave out one of your pet peeves from church? Let me know in a comment!
One of the songs I listened to while writing this was "My Savior, My God" by Aaron Shust.
I may not have it all figured out, but I do say what I think. If you have any questions about faith in Jesus, don't hesitate to email me. It's my job to help you out.
If you see any spelling/grammatical errors, PLEASE let me know in a comment. I expect others to use correct English, so I should too.
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Twitter:@GetItReallyReal
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Please keep it civil. The internet is already full of people who rail at each other over minutiae.